Smarty

... has another tooth on the bottom as of this morning! He also has been getting himself into a sitting position from laying position all on his own since two days ago!
He is trying to crawl...
He locks his little ankles for balance.. so cute!!!
Fed him a mac and cheese "dinner" (mush)... he liked it!

** 2nd Tooth... June18th 2010
** gets into sitting position on own.. June 16 2010..

Grandmas Viewing Monday May 17th.

...It is never easy. Even though you numb some with time and loss of others it doesnt quite prepare you for the vision you will see. I had been in denial. When we arrived at the viewing only I went in. First person I saw was Dad, and I hugged him. Thats almost when it hit me, seeing him in his suit and the feelings rushed over me. I had been here before, as a very young girl, maybe 8 viewing my Grandfather in his casket. Here I was again, about to face the face I truly did not want to see. The face of my beautiful Grandmother, although I knew it was not she, anymore. I tried to be composed as people came up and said hello, idle chit chat as it was, all the while I could see the beautiful pink toned casket ahead in the aisle with the beautiful flowers all around. I almost could glimpse her, and I wanted to flee.I did not want to see her lying there, my Grandmother with whom I could never picture lying in death.After some time, I slowly approached her. I waited until no one else was there and quietly walked up. She looked beautiful, although different, however very similar. I broke down then and sobbed, to see her beautiful face lying there although I knew I came to see it was still a shock to see. I touched her hair as it was the same feeling I had touched so many times before. I touched her eyelids and remembered how I used to do that as a child. I kissed her cold cheek and told her how much I loved her, even though I knew she was gone. Gone from me, never again to hold her. I know she is no longer suffering and has joined her husband and son. That gives me great comfort. I still miss her so................... I love you Grandma.

Trip to California...Cooper meets Grandma Jeanie!

Well we left on Sunday May 16th to begin our drive down to Cali. We were pretty nervous as Cooper doesnt like the car too well. Needless to say by the time we were just outside of Klamath Falls we really thought about turning back. It wasn't fun- he hated being strapped in there. We stayed at a motel that night for a quick few z's... Coop was picking the doggie off the quilt and when we asked where the doggie was he grabbed it and said "dog dog".. we continued on the next day the day of the viewing.

A VERY WONDERFUL plus side of going to Cali was getting to meet alot of family!

First stop was 725 Serrano Dr, where Cooper met his Grandma Jeanie! He took to her right away! We didnt have much time before we had to get dressed and get down to Santa Maria-

but it was so great to have Cooper finally meet my Mom!

It was also great to be at the house. It had been a long time since I had been there- it was as it always was..open and inviting..

It feels weird to combine these posts between sad and happy..but I guess thats the way life is..right?

Cooper felt very at ease with Grandma and immediatly took to her, I was so happy!

It was also like old times with Tanner!! We had missed her.

My Dear Grandma Lilas Passing

Lila Reynolds~ August .5. 1925- May. 12. 2010 Photo of Gram,Tanner and Cousin Alex

I am going to have a hard time writing this. I almost tried to call Gram yesterday. I guess I still cannot believe she is gone, nor do I want to accept it. I am having trouble accepting my grief and dealing with it. Here is what I wrote shortly after her passing:

I still cannot believe you are gone. My vivacious spunky eternal Grandmother. I am still in shock. You have always meant the world to me and the world will not be the same without you in it. You were my rock. Always there for me. Never doubting me or condenming me.You truly loved me as I did you. We held a special bond with one another that can never be replaced. You have always been not only a grandmother to me but also a very good friend. There are way too many memories to even begin. All I can say is Thank you,thank you for loving me unconditionally always. Thank you for also loving my family. Bucky, Tanner and Cooper. You are such a special woman and I am glad you are at peace now. I will love you forever and someday Gram, we will be together again.Until then I will miss you everyday. Charla

Gram went into the hospital the Thurs before Mothers day. She had pnemonia and was weak from not eating and not being able to swallow. I was able to tell her I loved her as well as my family and happy mothers day and she said she loved us too.- I really thought shed recover.

Well she didnt. She was getting weaker and begging "to let her die". She made the decision to not go to her dialysis appt on Tues and decided she was going to start a morphine drip to make her comfortable. My first initial feelings on this was NO! A feeling I soon realized as selfish. I SO wanted her to meet Cooper and she had let it be known many times to me that she was waiting to do so. Our plan was to go down as soon as school let out June 15th. She told me this a couple weeks before passing " I keep telling everyone I am not ready to go yet. I still have a great grandson I havent met yet.But what I really mean is I really want to see my grandaughter again". She told me how much she missed me and hoped I would be there soon. For this I will always feel guilty.

She started the morphine but before she did I was able to speak to her. I told her many things.Mostly how very much I would miss her and loved her- she mouthed she loved me too as she could not speak she was too weak. It is so hard to say a planned goodbye. How do you tell someone a lifetime of things you want to ,or never had the chance to say? I will forever love her for what she meant to me and my family. I miss her so.

Lagging on the Blog...

I came to a realization today. Why I have been lagging on the blog so much. I like to go in order and so I have to go back to write about stuff so I can write new stuff.... well I got all the way up to an"event" that I needed to write about and have just stopped. Thats the part on Grandma Lilas passing away. I miss her so much, and I need to write about it to go forward. However writing about it makes it more real , you know?Sounds strange. I keep wanting to pick up the phone and call her. So when I have some quiet time I will write about this day and the events following.

Cooper Has His First Tooth!

YAY! Cooper has a tooth! It must have busted in thru the night. Its on the bottom left.
I kept trying to feel his gums the last couple days but felt nothing and he was not cooperating!
This morning I was letting him have a sip from my glass and Bucky and I heard a distinct "clink" sound as he was trying to sip.. so we held him down ( literally) and Bucky pried his mouth open and looked and there was the little white tip!
The other side on the bottom is swollen so its probably next!

Oh and he has also been pulling up onto our laps when he wants us to pick him up. He loves the shower and this morning he pulled up to standing just holding Bucks fingers for him to get him and take him in!


** I went " out of order" to add this post!**
First Toother...June. 10. 2010

Cooper meets Grandpa and Grandma Hanson!

Grandpa Hanson and Grandma Hanson got into Sunriver on a tuesday afternoon. They came to watch Tanners track meet in Lapine then we hung out at the house for awhile. On Wed Mike picked up Bucky and they went Geocaching while Kelly and I hung out at the house. Wednesday evening they watched Tanners baseball game in Lapine then we went to Gordys for dinner.
Thursday( after the windshield was fixed hmmmm ummm) they picked Tan up 1/2 day from school for more Geo Caching and Kelly and I went to lunch at The Village Bar and Grill and had icecream from Goodys! It was fun! Then came home and made tacos and burritos for dinner.
We had a great visit. Never long enough but so great they could meet Cooper!

Mothers Day!

My first Mothers Day with 2 precious boys! We were headed up to Paulina Lake for lunch when we heard Grandma Lila took a turn for the worse-Dad headed there this morning so we changed plans to stay in cell range and had pork loin sandwiches and salads and hung out at my parents house and skipped going away for lunch, it was still a nice time, but we were all worried.Talked to Gram on the phone in the hospital and my Mom and Buckys Mom.

Tanner and Cooper made me special cards!

My Babes!

..Everyones seen it but I had to post it here too! A side by side pic of Tanner and Cooper!

Notice Coopers wearing Tanner outfit from 13 years ago! :)

Love it!

Track and Baseball...

Well Tanner talked us into BOTH!!! He finished track a couple weeks ago-it was his first year!

He did shotput- discus- 100 meter dash and a 4x200 relay. He even was chosen to go to the Catlin Gable Track Invitational in Portland which he brought home ribbons from in 3 events! It was an overnight trip and he had alot of fun!

He broke his school record for 7th grade discus-and at districts threw it 100.8 feet!

He ended up placing 1st in discus, 2nd in shot and 2nd in the relay at districts!!!

Now onto Baseball- Bucky stepped up and is the manager of the Sunriver Giants Majors team!

As of now we are 12-3. Tanner mostly plays catcher and has an awesome batting average!

He has pitched a couple innings and played 1st base but he rocks as a catcher! He have 2 more regular season games then the playoffs , then Allstars which I am pretty sure Bucky will coach since we are in 1st place-its fun to go watch the games with Cooper and cheer for Big Brother!!